Sleepless

The light from the street lamps far beneath my window falls among the roller blinds and creates streams of white on the walls and the ceiling while I lie wide awake in my bed. From the street outside I can hear the wooshing of the cars, coming and going. I try to imagine that it's the sound of waves, that I am standing on the shore while the water crashes against the cliffs. For a while it helps and I calm down, but then my mind starts to focus on the foreign noises again. Here and there I can hear the sirens of police cars which remind me of Manhattan and I ask myself if those are bringing people to the prison which is just across the street. For a while I think of the prisoners and what they did to end up in that place and what they are dreaming about in a place without dreams.

I wonder how I can see the light of the cars slowly fading through my room as they drive by because I am on the 4th floor and the street is somewhere beneath me. I wonder whether I feel alone because my flatmates haven't arrived yet and I am on my own for the next few days in this apartement or whether I don't because there are still 10 floors above me, and I am actually surrounded by people.

I wonder about a lot of things while I am lying in my bed, in my new furnished room, in a new city, in a new everything. I can't sleep because of all the noises and because the heating is too warm while I am freezing when it's turned off. I try to shut down all these thoughts in my mind because the drowsiness is taking me over more and more under my open eyes, staring on the ceiling. Sometimes they wander to the part where the two blinds doesn't exactly fit together and I can see the night sky, I can even see a star shining for me. As I  carefully push the blind beside, I catch sight of the whole night sky full of sparkling stars. If it wasn't so cool and windy, I would go outside on the balcony in front of my window and just stare at the sky, but I lay down back under my bed sheets and think that I will be here for quite a long time and can go outside another night. So I there I am, watching the streams of lights wandering through my room until the humming and wooshing of the traffic slowly carries me to sleep.